That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize