If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize