let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize