It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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