Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
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