You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
