you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
