With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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