I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
