I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize