He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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