your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize