Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
