R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
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