Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize
