doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
