omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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