Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
