what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
