So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
