I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
