I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize