: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
