super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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