I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
