Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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