He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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