Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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