porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I can't trust your balls anymore.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
