i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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