I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
