i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
This house was built for laser tag.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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