butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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