Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
