So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
