the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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