i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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