i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
