If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
