I bet he comes in French.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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