then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
