Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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