we made out on top of his cat.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize