Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
