I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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