you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
