We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize