I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
