How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
