He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
