windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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